Are you beginning to dream that your child faster became an adult due to conflicts with a spouse? Unfortunately, a lot of parents who have gone through a divorce are facing this. But no matter how much you would like, the child will not become an adult tomorrow, but the conflict in the context of co-parenting is not only possible but also needs to be hushed up.
Even if it seems impossible! Let’s look at the main points that will help get rid of conflicts with the former spouse, or at least minimize quarrels.
Organize a Divorce Process Properly
If you have any difficulties regarding your divorce, then you can always contact online companies that will help filling out divorce forms. There you will get an understanding of divorce application form, which will provide you with a fast divorce. In fact, this way you will prepare forms for divorce simply and without unnecessary costs.
Agree, this is exactly what the traditional way to get a divorce is missing.
Define the Purpose of Your Communication
Most conflicts occur due to the fact that spouses involve personal matters during communication. That is why it is very important to realize that your communication should concern only your child and no other questions.
That is, when you write an e-mail with some information regarding your child, you do not need to write anything else. No memories, reproaches, and so on. You are now completely free people and a child binds you.
Therefore, every time you plan communication or correspondence, remember that you should speak only on the merits and only regarding co-parenting issues. Before sending a message, make sure that you will not explode your spouse’s emotions and do not offend him or her.
If the spouse does not communicate with you in the best manner, then you should not react to this. Otherwise, quarrels cannot be avoided. But most likely, if you begin to maintain conciseness and respectfulness in communication, then your ex will communicate with you in the same way.
Set and Maintain Boundaries
Another point that causes many conflicts is the violation of boundaries.
Since you and your spouse separated, this means that everyone’s home is a personal territory. Therefore, no one gives you the rule to dictate how your spouse needs to behave at home and vice versa. The same goes for you. But of course, when it doesn’t about the safety and health of the child. In this case, it may be necessary to get the help of the court.
Therefore, you immediately need to establish your home as a border and ask your spouse to abide by these boundaries.
Well, and accordingly vice versa. Understand that it’s not difficult for children to accept different rules at parent’s home. It is better to observe different rules than to observe the quarrels of parents each time.
Do Not Turn the Child Against Your Former Spouse
Do not constantly tell your child bad things about a spouse.
Firstly, you undermine moral health, and secondly, you can create problems in court. The child can tell the spouse that you said something bad about him/her. And this can make the spouse go to court. So you should not create unnecessary problems for yourself and injure the psyche of the child.
Do Not Use Your Child to Exchange Information
You should not pass on any information to your spouse through your child.
This will once again show the child that you have an acute relationship, and you will also annoy your spouse in this way. But it is even worse when both sides begin to communicate through the child. If you really want to reduce conflicts and not injure the psyche of the child, then write a message to your spouse. Remember, your child is not a carrier pigeon!
Try to Improve Relationships with Spouse
If you want all conflicts to end and your child finally stops feeling like a blanket being dragged from one side to the other, then it will be vital to try to improve relations with the former.
Of course, it will be difficult to become best friends. But you can at least start smiling at a meeting and communicate respectfully. Well, for this you need to learn how to deal with anger and resentment.
Do this for the sake of your child and for the sake of stopping constantly quarreling and not climbing out of the past.
Avoiding conflicts in such a case as co-parenting is an extremely difficult task.
But it is quite achievable! The main thing is to understand that you must achieve this not only in your interests but also in the interests of the child. And of course, it’s important to understand that this is possible with the efforts of both parties. Follow the above recommendations and then you will succeed.