How Men Can Find Happiness After Divorce

signs your wife wants a divorce couple on a park bench guy has his head in his hands and the woman is looking away Middle Class Dad

As you’re going through a divorce, there’ll be a period of time when you’re going to need to find a way to deal with the pain and grief that you’re feeling. Recently, divorce has become even more complicated as a result of the ongoing COVID-19 pandemic. You may wonder how men can deal with this and how they can find happiness after a divorce.

There are many different things that you’ll want to do when you’re going through a divorce, and not all of them will be productive. Below are some tips that can help you deal with your situation so that you can move forward with some hope.

Don’t worry, there’s always a light at the end of the tunnel!

  • Have The Right Support System

While you may think that you’re the only one who’s having a hard time dealing with your feelings, you’ll be surprised at how many men are in the same situation.

You may even have close friends or family who’ve gone through a divorce before. You may find that some of your friends can give you advice and be able to point you towards the direction of things that you need to know so that you can get through the difficult time and finally move on. 

Another thing that you can do is to make sure that you get some counseling.

This can be an especially good option if you can afford it or if it’s something that you’ve never done before. If you don’t have a lot of money to spend on getting counseling, then, you may want to start with talking with other people who’ve been in this situation in the past and see how they’ve handled the situation.

You’ll also want to make sure that you take advantage of all of the resources that are available to you.

Once you’re able to figure out some ways to handle your emotions, chances are you’ll be able to move forward with some hope in your life. If you’re going through a divorce and need better support, consider hiring an experienced divorce lawyer to get help with divorce.

Having the right legal counsel in these trying times can help make the process much smoother and less painful for all parties involved. 

  1. Understand Your Situation

While it’s easy to get caught up in your emotions while you’re going through a divorce, it’s important to keep a clear head. Rather than acting out in sadness and anger, try to understand that the divorce is for the best and will ultimately make things better for you and your ex-spouse. 

Understanding the situation you are in is key to seeing a way out of it. Similarly, knowing your risk for divorce can put things into perspective.

Nearly 45% of marriages end in divorce, so it’s not an uncommon situation, nor one that you should feel ashamed of. While often painful, divorce is a relatively normal occurrence and may be the best choice for you and your ex-partner. After all, it gives you a chance to put some unhappy parts of your past behind you and get a fresh start!

  1. Look Out For Your Children

If you have children, it’s important to also consider their wellbeing along with your own.

Parents divorcing is one of the most traumatic things that children can experience, especially if it’s a particularly messy divorce. Keeping things amicable between you and your ex will help lessen the negative impact on your children, and will help you maintain a good relationship with them after the divorce. 

After getting a divorce, it’s a must to find ways to spend time with your kids.

Your children may feel betrayed or saddened by your divorce, but, with time, they’ll come to understand how important it was for you and your ex-spouse. Whether you have full or partial custody of your children or limited visitation rights, you can still be a good dad for your kids

  1. Live And Let Live

When you decide to move on and try to find happiness, you’ll need to work with your ex-spouse on some things.

You might have to let go of some things that you’ve been holding on to for a long time, but it will be good for both of you to realize that things weren’t always so bad and that things can be good again.

Let go of any negative feelings of bitterness and animosity so that you can cooperate. This will help you care for your children if you have any, and ultimately care for yourself as well.

This also means making sure that you’re getting on with your life.

If you haven’t had time to get over the divorce, it might take some time. But, this shouldn’t mean that you just sit around and wait for someone to come along and help you feel better. It’s time to get back to doing the things you need and love to do.

  1. Learn From The Past

While it’s possible to make a connection with your ex-spouse after divorcing, it’s important to remember why you got divorced in the first place. In general, this will keep you from falling into the same harmful pattern again.

This means that you’ll need to learn how to handle your anger and other negative emotions in a constructive manner. Anger is the root cause of many problems, and when you’re feeling angry, you’ll need to focus on ways to learn how to control this emotion.

Learning to control your negative emotions is one of the most important things that you can do for your happiness after a divorce. 

The second thing that you need to understand about the end of the marriage is that you’ll have a different perspective than your ex. You’ll come to realize that you’re wrong and that they’re wrong as well. When you humble yourself and learn from your mistakes, you’ll know how to make your next marriage work.

This is why it’s important that you seek counseling so that you can make your next relationship a better one.

You should also avoid running into a new relationship immediately after your divorce. This could lead to replicating the same kind of relationship dynamics that landed you in a divorce in the first place.

Instead, take some time to reflect on your wants and needs, as well as the lessons you need to learn before you feel you can have a healthy relationship. 

  1. Learn About And Take Care Of Yourself

Rather than seeing divorce as an end, it can be helpful to approach it as a new beginning.

It’s an excellent opportunity to get to know yourself better. Find out your likes, dislikes, and goals. You might even consider starting a new hobby or continuing a passion that has been put on hold for a long time!

You also need to make sure that you’re getting into shape and that you’re doing everything that you need to do so that you can be happy and healthy again.

Exercise, eat right, and do plenty of self-care. It’s a hard time that you’re going through, but treating yourself well will help ease the pain and put you on track to a better life.

Divorce also means taking care of yourself financially.

Getting a divorce can be costly, and between legal fees and alimony, you may end up in a huge amount of debt. It will take some more work to get back on track financially. You’ll need to stop all of the irresponsible spending habits that you’ve been using to get by and focus on more sustainable practices for the future.

  1. Give Yourself Time

When all is said and done, the first thing that you’ll want to do is take some time away from the situation.

When you’re faced with a situation as stressful as divorce, it’s going to make your body feel tired and, thus, you might need to take a break from life to relax. It may seem like the best idea to be at home and crying all night, but doing so will not make you feel any better or change the whole situation.

You need to let go of the anger and the grief that you’re feeling, and to look at the whole situation in a much more positive light. 

You’ll come to realize that when you take a break from your life, you’ll begin to relax and your thoughts will become more peaceful. When you begin to think more calmly, you’ll be able to start focusing better on the things that you need to do. You’ll feel much happier, and you’ll have a better chance at getting your life back on track.

The Bottom Line

Divorce can be one of the most difficult experiences you’ll have to go through in your life.

There’s no way around it. But, it’s not uncommon, and, usually, it’s the best choice for both people involved. You may soon realize that divorce is a chance for you to start afresh and build a happier life for yourself. Just keep these key tips in mind and keep on that path to a bright, happier future!

Jeff Campbell

Jeff Campbell is a father, martial artist, budget-master, Disney-addict, musician, and recovering foodie having spent over 2 decades as a leader for Whole Foods Market. Click to learn more about me

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