The first few months after having a baby can be a really overwhelming time in new parents’ lives. There seems to be a never ending list of things to do and not enough time in the day to do them, plus a completely new set of fears and responsibilities. If you feel like you’re struggling to find the information you need to take care of your baby, the Nutricia FAQ page is a great resource for new parents with specific concerns or questions. In the midst of the challenges of life with a new baby, romance often takes a backseat, but it doesn’t have to stay that way forever.
Immediately after the baby is born, you and your partner will probably just be treading water for a while; trying to manage everything and stay afloat. However, when you have the chance to come up for air, there are some things you can do to make sure your relationship stays blissful and strong.
Talk, Talk, Talk
One of the most important aspects of any relationship is communication. When there are problems with the way you’re expressing your feelings and boundaries to each other, it may start to feel like things are going sour. You should be open and honest with your partner about how you’re feeling and what you need – don’t let anything build up and lead to resentment.
When you have a baby with your partner, something that often results in arguments is the distribution of chores, housework and parenting responsibilities. If one parent feels more overburdened than the other, this could create difficulties within the relationship. A pre-emptive discussion and written list of who will take care of which jobs each week may help to prevent this from turning into a major problem.
It can also be difficult to find time for yourself when you’re looking after a baby. If you feel like you are in desperate need of some alone time, being able to have this time may also help your relationship, because you won’t be so overwhelmed.
Show Your Love
Showing your appreciation for your partner can also go a long way towards maintaining a sense of closeness and warding off feelings of resentment. Thank your partner for everything they do for you and your baby, even if you feel like they’re just doing what they need to do. It’s nice to feel appreciated, even when we’re not doing anything out of the ordinary.
If you do want to make your partner feel extra special, small gestures can go a long way. Try picking up a bouquet of flowers or purchasing your partner’s favourite snack when you’re at the grocery store. Sweet gestures like these can really benefit the connection in a relationship, especially when you may not have many opportunities to spend quality time together.
Make Each Other A Priority
Of course, it might feel impossible to make time for each other when you have so many other priorities to attend to. However, it’s important to remember that the other person is not just your child’s mother or father, they are your life partner. They are the person you will make all your important decisions with and spend the rest of your life with after your kids have grown up and moved out. It makes sense to prioritise this relationship without feeling guilty about it.
Planning date nights are a great way to make sure that you have an opportunity to spend some time just being with each other, so organise a babysitter or ask a friend to look after your baby in advance. You can also carve out some time on a regular basis to talk to each other about something other than your baby – have coffee together in the morning or sit down to watch the same television programme together. Make it a point to make this time take precedence over everything except an emergency.
Be Spontaneous
Back when you first started dating, it was probably a lot easier to plan things last minute and do whatever you felt like doing at any given moment. The arrival of a baby can leave little room for spontaneity in a relationship, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t get creative. Show up to your partner’s work on their lunch break, text each other romantic things throughout the day or leave amorous notes around the house.
Sex, romance and physical affection can be some of the first things to go when a relationship isn’t receiving the attention it needs. Breaking up a regular routine and acting on passion or impulse is a great way to try and bring them back.
References:
https://www.moms.com/couples-advise-20-ways-to-keep-the-romance-alive-after-the-baby-arrives/
https://www.parents.com/parenting/relationships/staying-close/marriage-after-baby/
https://www.workingmother.com/new-mom-home/5-steps-keeping-romance-alive-after-baby-born#page-4
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