What is it like for a single dad on the dating scene? Find out the reality in this guide to being a single dad and dating.
Are you trying to figure out dating as a single father?
People often wonder what it’s like to be one. Most single dads say it’s not all that bad once you get the hang of it.
What they don’t tell you is what you have to go through while they were new at it. Stress, coupled with the pressure of being a role model for their children, often makes the best of them crack.
They also feel a sense of loneliness as a single parent. This often compels them to date again, and this is as hard as the other parts of being a single father.
If you’re facing this struggle and don’t know what to do, read on. Learn how dating works as a single father.
There’s No Pressure on Whether You Date Now or Later
Being a single dad means you have the power to decide whether you’re ready to date. No one else has any right to tell you if you’re ready or not, besides your children, but more on that later.
Most men have it in their minds they have to date as soon as possible.
This stems from the outdated stigma that men need to be strong and okay with the situation. Separation from your first partner hits hard, and it’s okay to deal with that first. Stepping into the dating scene while you’re still recovering may end up being messy for you.
The Fear Is All in Your Head
Most men are afraid of getting back into the scene. This is often because this is the first time they’re single in years.
Most of them fear their looks have waned or that they’ve gained too much weight during their time with their previous partner.
Those are normal thoughts to have when you’re a single parent. All the negative comments you often think of are in your head. These thoughts come because you haven’t dressed yourself up for a date.
Once you do, you’ll see there was nothing to worry about. You’ll notice your looks have held up, as long as you’ve cleaned and dressed yourself up.
You can find out more about how to dress up on your first date as a single father at https://flybirdapparel.com/blogs/news/what-to-wear-on-a-first-date.
Your Kids Need to Have a Say in the Situation
What single fathers don’t realize is that dating impacts their children’s lives too. This often manifests as feelings of bitterness in children. They often feel as if dating becomes the top priority of their fathers, not them.
Reassuring the kids they’re still the top priority is often the best course of action.
Dates Think You’re Looking for a Replacement for Your Kids
A common misconception among dates is they think you’re looking for a replacement mom or partner. Single fathers know more than anyone that no one will replace their children’s mother. Clearing this up with your date is important to avoid any awkward interactions.
Instead, tell them you’re looking for someone to spend time with. This removes some pressure on them and makes the date more enjoyable for you both.
No One Needs to Know About Your Dating Life
Starting to date again comes with an overwhelming feeling of happiness.
This can make single fathers eager to share their experiences. This is a good way to express what you’re feeling, but you need to have some restraint on who you share it with.
The kids don’t need to know about how your dates went. They’ll end up having conflicting feelings about the situation. If you need to talk about it with your children, stick to basic information.
Tell them about her looks, name, and nothing else. You can ask them if they’re okay with you continuing about your date. Respect them if they say no and say nothing else about her until they ask.
Children May Have an Attachment to Your Date
A great risk of introducing your new girlfriend to toddlers is that they may imprint on them. This is often the case when you bring the first date over. This is among the reasons why you should be careful during introductions.
If you want their first meeting to go well, there are factors for you to consider. The place where they’ll first meet will impact the mood of your kids. Have your date come over instead to accommodate them.
Being in a familiar environment will make it easier for you to put them in a good mood.
Finding the Right Lady Isn’t Hard
Looking for the right woman to be your new partner isn’t as hard as people think. Most people have the idea that the ideal woman left them to be a single dad. This is often why they find it hard to find someone to connect with.
What most single fathers need to do is enjoy their time with someone until they know how to feel about them. Feelings develop over time and you need to allow yourself to feel certain about the relationship.
Once you know what you need to do, you’ll see that finding the right lady for you isn’t as hard as you first imagined.
Kids Know What’s Up
A delicate topic to approach when you’re going back to the dating scene is sex.
Being a single father means it may have been a while for you since the last time you’ve been intimate with someone; often, it’s your previous partner. This often means being intimate with someone else will be a new experience for you.
As with all new experiences, you’re often cautious about how you approach it. A common worry among single fathers is how their kids will react to it. They often try to hide it by being quiet and discreet.
You should know that you need not bend yourself backward doing this. Your children know about your needs as an adult and don’t mind it. This is as long as you don’t brag about it to them.
Know What Dating and Being a Single Dad Is Today
Being a single dad isn’t as easy as they make it seem. By learning how the dating scene is for them, you now know the struggles of being a single father nowadays.
Dating and socializing is only the beginning. Fortunately, we’ve got more tips and tricks to help you navigate through the process of forging a relationship and more. Feel free to read through all our other guides today!